Freakin’ Out Arrrrr

Filed Under:English, Jokes, Lameeee!!, Clean

There once was pirate captain who, whenever it looked like a battle would be imminent would change into a red shirt. After observing this behavior for a few months, one of the crew members asked him what it meant.

“It’s in case I get shot. I don’t want you crew members to see blood and freak out.”

“That’s very sensible, sir.” At that moment, the crew member spotted eight hostile ships on the horizon. The captain all of a sudden looked very concerned.

“Get my brown pants.”

A hole behind

Filed Under:English, Dirty, Jokes

A man, while playing on the front nine of a complicated golf course, became confused as to where he was on the course. Looking around, he saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her, explained his confusion and asked her if she knew what hole he was playing.

She replied, “I’m on the 7th hole and you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 6th hole.” He thanked her and went back to his golf.

On the back nine the same thing happened and he approached her again with the same request. She said, “I’m on the 14th, and you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 13th.” Once again he thanked her and returned to his play.

He finished his round and went into the club house where he saw the lady sitting at the end of the bar. He asked the bartender if he knew the lady. The bartender said that she was a sales lady and played the course often.

He approached her and said, “Let me buy you a drink to show my appreciation for your help. I understand that you are a sales lady …. well, I am in sales also. What do you sell?”

She replied, “If I told you, you would only laugh.”

“No I wouldn’t,” he said and persisted that she tell him what she sold.

“Well if you must know”, she answered, “I sell Tampax.”

With that, he fell on the floor and laughed so hard he almost lost his breath. She said, “See I knew you would laugh.”

“That’s not what I’m laughing at,” he replied, “I’m a toilet paper salesman, so I’m still a hole behind you!”

Pathan ka Beta

Filed Under:Urdu/Hindi, Pathan, Jokes, Clean

Pathan k 20 saal baad beta huwa lekin woh udaas ho gaya.

Friend : Yaar udaas kyun ho?

Pathan : Ek to 20 saal baad beta huwa aur woh bhi itna sa.

Translation

Filed Under:Urdu/Hindi, Jokes

Teacher: Iss sentence ka urdu mein tarjuma karo:

“Look freind, a beautiful girl is walking in the park.”

Student :
“Jigar, Bacchi check kar”

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